keeping a a tight leash

okay this is what you call a pre-depression or pre-project or fucked up pre-assignment blues. WHATEVER.

anyway, i gotta keep a tight leash on my moods. i'm having what the girls call the bloody period of their month, and for me, YEAH evrything turns bloody hellish. my eyes are red-rimmed too, meaning i gotta keep a tight leash on my sleeping patterns. know what, yesterday i slept at 9pm, only to wake up to bathe at 11, then do marketing till 1, and sleep again till 2 to wake up and do god knows what till 4am. in conclusion, i slept at 4 and oh fudge. oh god. my body, my schedule, and my life....... assignments........ kill me.

keep a tight leash on my spendings. god knows the whole time i've been down here, i've been over spending.. for the whole time. SHET. my mom's gonna kill me! my accounts are APPALLING. in a bad way. i got two coats last week and though they were on wow-oh-so-cheap deals, i'm still having troubles reconciling the fact that i got TWO last VIP night in chadstone. then, keeping a tight leash on my study sched, not to procrastinate wayyyyyyy too much. and those gossip sessions, oh i gotta keep a REAL tight watch on that one. FUN, sinful and VERY addictive.

keeping the leash on my fasting ways too! just yesterday, when i'm supposed to fast, i actually put on channel 10 and ended up transfixed on the TV for glee's get it right and loser like me. damn. it happened when i'm FULLY aware that i'm not supposed to watch it for fasting reasons and assignment reasons. BUT OH HELL. where's the leash on my self control when i needed it most?!

it's all about balance, you see?

and i think you're gonna hear from me ALOT today. i've decided to cram for assignment in the house and DARN ain't that boring?

fasting

now, i know when you hear the word 'fasting', the next word that pops in your head is 'Muslim'. well, it doesn't have to be so. to be precise, yeahh, i'm a Buddhist and i still fast for religious reasons. not for dieting, certainly, at least not 100% ;) this is one way to train oneself to be holier-than-thou, and can as such protect you from dangers and worldly desires. HAHA. you may not take me as one, but i am pretty spiritual, in a way :D.

here are a set of rules for teenage Buddhist fast-ers:

no1 : no MUSIC
no singing, no listening to music, and no downloading (as much as possible). NO music to go through your head at ALL!



no2 : no eating after 12 in the afternoon, on the dot.
well, what my mom used to say, as long as you don't eat after lunch (no matter the time =='), it's..okay. you don't wanna get sick, do you? and hey, who am I to say no to my mommy? oh, but water and fruit juice (seedless) are allowed. no milk, no dairy products, but honey. and i don't know why honey's allowed, so don't ask :) . you can still have the super duper dark chocolate as a snack in the evening, but you can't bite through it, only keep it in your mouth and let it dissolve slow but sure. anything else (yes, including liqueurs, drunkards) are buh-bye!



no3 : NO games
monopoly: cross!
poker cards: cross!
UNO: cross!
snake and ladder: cross!
hide and seek: well, cross!



no4 : no novels, movies, fiction stuffs
i was about to say no BOOKs, when i realise that hey, TEXTBOOKs are definitely in the 'allowed' list. news, or so i heard are also okay, but none of those 'friends' craps or sitcoms. or even GLEE! goshh. and i'm in such a mood to watch too! AND i am in the middle of a good book! :"(



no5: i'm not really sure if you can fuck when you fast :s, but i guess i don't know cause to me, that info is sorta irrelevant. sorry, sex-addicts.



all the usual: no stealing, lying, gambling, drinking, killing or even physically 'hurting' others, cheating on your wife/hubby, or insulting other beings. sadhu!



no7 : hardest: NO GOSSIPS.
APPARENTLY, GOSSIPING IS A SIN! and this one supposedly means no blackberry-m-ing, tweeting, facebooking, and blah. and maybe even no blogging?! *sigh* can't do it! can't do it...



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sounds like torture? at times. yet i still do it twice a week. bless my soul.